Yesterday I was reminded that events in our lives – even the sad or nasty ones – are unfolding exactly as they are supposed to. You simply cannot make a mistake. Once again, I am awed by the unfolding of events in my life. Things that I thought were absolutely horrible, like being fired from my job or being left behind by society, are turning out to be…kind of excellent things.
REMEMBER THIS: you are doing exactly what you’re meant to do – even the “bad” stuff.
I know my life is very small
I think about what I’ve done and how I live and I realized – I am OK with “small.” After all, I don’t want the responsibility of being a billionaire. Nor do I want to live up to a public image like famous people are forced to do. I love my anonymity. It equals freedom and I love to feel free. I’ve been able to provide for my needs – even in tough times – and am proud of how well I’ve done with how little I’ve had sometimes.
This goes for my emotional state, too. Not many of us who grew up in the sixties and seventies had warm, fuzzy parents. Most of us got spanked, put to bed without supper if we “misbehaved,” sent to a corner or strapped at school if we “acted up,” told how “unspecial” we were by all adults, and later fired at work if the boss’ kid needed our job, and so on. It made us the largest group of smart-asses in history. Trust me, we know how to entertain. When you have only a few minutes to impress a parent, teacher or a boss, you learn to get right to the punch line and make ‘em laugh. Maybe – just maybe – they’ll keep you around.
Still, it sometimes makes me sad to think that in a few years there will be no one left on earth to remember me or who I am. This is something many of us are going to be facing in our lives because our children are choosing not to have children.
So Here’s the Story
Yesterday I opened my email (unusual – I don’t like checking it – I’m behind over 20,000 emails). I had to open it because I needed the address for my dance class. They’d had to cancel earlier in the month due to a double-booking (unplanned event).
I then saw an email from the ONLY guy I subscribe to on Substack: Charles Eisenstein (unusual). Now he had written a couple months ago saying that he was feeling pressure to write because of his subscribers but that he was in a place where he was too busy to write regularly. He was suspending our payments as he didn’t feel right about accepting money (following his values). I wrote back that I was fine with continuing to support him in whatever he chose to do. He is one of the finest human beings on the planet. Read his writing and see if you don’t agree.
Incidentally, he is busy because he is working on Robert Kennedy’s election campaign. I would vote for Robert Kennedy if I was a US citizen (unexpected commonality). Charles wrote a thoughtful piece about still supporting Kennedy while disagreeing with him over his stance on Israel. I feel similarly: Don’t Fail Me Now.
About meeting and eventually working with Kennedy, Charles writes, “It all started a couple months ago with a “coincidence.” Robert F. Kennedy, Jr. knew my work vaguely before then, as a fellow Covid dissident and environmentalist. But that had little to do with this coincidence. One of my readers won a fundraising raffle for “a day of falconry with Robert F. Kennedy, Jr.” She was allowed to take a guest, so she invited me.”
My Coincidences
I found Charles’ writing during one of the darkest times in my life. (Welcome Dirty Unvaxxed ) I’m not a right-wing person, although I’m much more conservative than I used to be for sure. I didn’t fit in with the one group in town that continued to protest the mandates as they were really far right. For some reason, they were also mostly keto or carnivore. I was vegan at the time and quite frankly, horrified. Bacon and other smoked meat cause CANCER! Look it up. Another value of mine is not to hurt animals. Here’s a tip: EATING ANIMALS HURTS THEM.
But equally horrifying were the lefties. I was shocked at how they “turned” so belligerently intolerant. Refused to listen or to acknowledge that there were other opinions even…that people had a RIGHT to do what they would with their own bodies. Hypocrites. Here’s a tip: BODILY AUTONOMY APPLIES TO VACCINATION, TOO.
Now I’ve pissed off both halves of you. Sorry / not sorry. I really believe we each must be free to choose. Even eating animals. I will not support anyone or any governing body that mandates what I put in or don’t put in my body or what I decide to do with it. Bottom line: it’s my body and my life.
Back to Charles Eisenstein
Charles seems intelligent, thoughtful, and kind. During the mandates, very few people were in the middle of both camps. Both sides were screaming that you were either with them or against them. Sure, some old friends “tolerated” me but I was not accepted. I became despondent. It was the saddest of times. His writing gave me hope for a better, kinder, world. I became a paying subscriber, even though Charles doesn’t make anyone pay for his writing – he believes the writing is everyone’s. (following his values) I decided to support him – even though I had been fired for refusing to be vaccinated and I was freaking out about money (What’s Your Integrity Worth? The 25 Million Dollar Woman). (following my values, unforeseen event)
Events Unfold
I found a job at a local health food store (Starting Over for the 22nd Time) (following my values). Here I began healing. And I met Betty, who became a great friend of mine (unexpected event).
Betty and I shared a lot of things in common, one of them being meditation. She’s the one who introduced me to a small group of people doing Dr. Joe Dispenza’s Walk for the World meditation. I showed up and have been continuing to show up (following my values).
You could say that even having this grass roots group start up here in this small town last fall was serendipitous but that is not my story to tell.
At this point, I was so crushed that I decided not to make any friends anymore and to just do meditation and live a quiet life. I was butt-hurt and pretty sad about people in general. However, for some reason, after going to these weekly meditation walks, I began to feel better about life. One day, I decided to learn to dance. I enjoyed it so much…I signed up for the second set of lessons…and a couple weeks ago one got bumped due to an over-booked venue so it was rescheduled for…yesterday….
All This Just to Get Me to Open a Bloody Email
Ha! You really have to give the universe credit for a sense of timing – and humour. I finally opened up my email.
Charles explained in this email how he’d cancelled not only his writing but most of his speaking engagements yet he’d decided to do just one event. JUST ONE.
In my country. A country so large that it takes several days driving to cross it – something I’ve never done. Not only this, the location for this event is not far from me in my province. An easy drive for me.
This guy – the ONLY guy on the whole PLANET that I subscribe to – will be coming to speak at a meditation retreat near me. There will be a grand total of 500 people there. He has nearly 80,000 subscribers on Substack alone.
If I hadn’t had to look up the address of my dance studio, I wouldn’t have seen the email from Charles.
If I hadn’t gone to the meditation group regularly, I wouldn’t have started dancing.
If I hadn’t been fired for refusing to be vaccinated, I wouldn’t have met Betty.
If I hadn’t been tossed out of society for my views, I wouldn’t have read or subscribed to Charles Eisenstein.
Or be attending a retreat coming up in October.
I don’t have many expectations for this weekend at all. In general, I dislike going to large gatherings like this for an extended period of time. As social as I am, they exhaust me emotionally. I also love being home – you know, where nothing ever happens.
But I am hoping to be able to thank Charles for writing, if I get a chance. Other than that, I know better than to expect anything at all. After all, whatever the universe wants, the universe gets.
